I Struggle.

Repsot: May 19, 2006

Current mood:scared

At times I wonder where this path is leading me and am I ready.
I check the facts. I educate myself and surround myself with strong people. And yet with all this education and strong family ties...I struggle.
I wonder if my career has led me into the webs of Babylon and yet I wonder about the purpose of this lesson that Jah has bestowed upon me.
I struggle.
Does my inner circle believe that I am true in these beliefs? Are they willing to be patient with me...Can I be patient with myself as I learn how a true Queen behaves...
Sometimes, I have a hard time understanding...and yet I understand that when it comes to Jah...our understanding is too small.
My struggle.
It involves my career...my hopes and dreams...my beliefs
I struggle to take care of myself and learn survival techniques relevant to this earth. Straying from the truth so many times and I don't want to do it anymore. Can't take no more...because the road to Zion is real and not even mama can steer me from that...
So why do I question myself...and why must I have inner conflicts with such a small aspect as vegetarianism...it's not just about staying in the light with the food I choose to nourish my temple...
It is about spiritual survival. I should be able to live strong and survive off the natural fruits of the earth. Live off the nutrition of Mother Earth.
And yet with that I struggle.