Current mood:
focused
I want to clarify without giving away his true identity or giving away too much information...focusedThis person or person(s) i have been writing about here in my blogs for so long....
It's not really this person but rather this spirit and I first came in contact with this spirit a few years back.
I really thought it was breathtaking but that was it...I wanted to go along on my way - ALONE.
I tried to escape but this spirit had a hold on me...it would not let me be.
So soon I gave in - it was so exhilarating at first. Like a whirlwind...
but then I felt as if maybe there was more out there and perhaps I was falling too deep into this black hole...I did not want to lose control or my existence
I was enjoying it - really I was. I was into him and wanted to continue on with him....but it was just then that I realized...I was into him...
Quickly I had to get out of it. I had to run. I mean after all, I was not supposed to be with him I mean he was not tall enough, dark enough, natural enough...I could find every excuse. And I did.
I found every excuse and I ran. Skip out on him.
Never really allowed him to stay away forever. " I can't leave you alone" he said
"I knew you different the moment I saw you" he said....
"I gotta escape this dream" I thought....
And now he comes back in a different body and his spirit has evolved....it only makes me miss the old days...
Talking about religion, watching football, hanging with his friends, listening to his music, talking about our dreams....making our own dreams...
His spirit came back to me and its harder than ever to turn away....
Let me explain that he is very important to me - unfortunately, I am just too afraid to allow him to come any closer than he already has...
So I write for him.
If he reads this...then maybe...maybe he could just once know and ovastand how I feel.
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