Being Real....

Repost: Mar 28, 2007

 

Current mood:pissed off

Today I discussed interest to move to another division at my agency. A division that was more in tuned with what I did in my previous position and with what I studied in school.
Not that my current office is not a group of adequate indivuals- give or take a few lost souls...
This is strictly a career move. Nothing more. Nothing less.
However, I was accused of being fake in wanting to leave my division....Fake....this from the very same person who tells me to wear make-up and to get a perm.
But, I am not being real.
I asked to move to this division because it is right in line with what I studied...my degree field....a power move...a career move.
And for that, I am fake. Even as I walk through the halls with my true face and my hair just as it grows from my head....even in my natural state as Jah made me....my ass is fake and not about being real....like she is...because that is what she specializes in.
Eventhough, her hair is blond and straight - thanks to Revlon.....
I'm fake because I don't want to stick to the program and allow others to dictate who I should be and where to stay. Maybe she took this personal. And in that case - she also has a problem with vanity. It's not about her, no matter how good she thinks her blond tresses look.
I want all of you out there, who read my blogs, to know that I don't persecute anyone for looking the way they do....hair weaves, straight and colored hair and nails....I don't care...it is all accessories to me being in the fashion industry.
My point is that if you are going to make statements to me about my looks then come real with it and make some damn sense. And if you are going to sling accusations my way then make sure that you are not at fault for that very same sin that you claim me to be.
She does not understand that my wanting to make this power move is not about "keeping it real" but more about "taking care of business." Fake would be me sitting in a division where I fit in okay and not taking a chance to go for another positon within another division where I fit in perfectly. It is the exact same thing I did at my previous place of employment and I was damn good at what I did.
Perhaps she wanted me to say "Oh, I want that other position because it pays more." But if I had said that, then I truly would be fake....because the truth of the matter is...shit, I would take that position without the pay increase...and that's real! So I told her the truth and that is what hurt her...but I was being fake by saying that.
Perhaps she knows something I don't....because she now talks to me as if I got the position. Maybe that is the issue... and if so, she needs to express that....but don't call me fake when I clearly look like the wombman that Jah made me....no gloss, noo cover ups - just me.
When she looks in the mirror, I wonder who it is that she sees.